Picnic...

"We need to do this more." - Us.

We live a mile from the Pacific Coast, and we find ourselves rarely taking advantage of it, especially during the winter months. Just like everyone else, we get wrapped in our lives and the stresses each day can bring. We talk about stress as if most of it is out of our control. I feel we get set on auto-pilot-mode, letting others dictate our decisions. The emotional toll that stress brings allows us to get lazy. It is easy to sit on the couch after a day at work to watch something mind-numbing, order some food from whatever food-delivery app has the best deal of the day, and pass out. Our laziness can be a vicious cycle.

I had a rare Saturday night off, and instead of going to a happy hour somewhere, getting tired, and crashing on the couch, Jamie and I decided to do a beach picnic. I raced home from work and kicked off my shoes - exchanging them for my flip flops - and we rolled down the hill to the beach in our comfortably converted VW Vanagon. There was almost no one on the beach, so we picked a spot to spread out and enjoyed the sunset. The summer breeze was coming in from the sea, and the sounds of the ocean crashing down on the sand played softly in the background as we dug into our dinner.

It is nice to put the phones down and have a conversation. I love technology as much as anyone; however, unplugging can help clear your head and get back to the scenery around us. Beauty is everywhere; you don't need a beach picnic to realize it - not to say that it doesn't help. There is always something beautiful around if we take a second to notice it. As the sun set and disappeared behind the Santa Monica mountains, I almost wanted to clap as if a band had just finished their encore.

We stayed on the beach for an extra few minutes to finish our drinks and snap a few photos; not a bad little Saturday night. We both committed to doing this more often. If I could, I would eat every meal on the beach. Take a second to see if you can find something worth pausing and admiring today.

It might just change your mood.

-YourFriendMatt

Bachelor Party...

"Should we start a fight?" - My Dad.

It has been one week since my bachelor party. It is insane how fast time flies. I wait our entire lives for some moments, and in an instant, they are over. It has already been a week, and I wish I could go back to last weekend and relive the entire experience. Spending time with my family and friends is a luxury, and I often forget how special it can be.

We got off our red-eye flight from LAX to Philadelphia and immediately were reinvigorated. The sweet scent of the trash-filled air, the grit of the Philadelphia TSA, and the gray, overcast weather connected us right back to our roots; we are home. Someone pushed past us as we made our way through the terminal. They yelled something along the lines of, “Get the fuck out of my way, you pussies!” Philadelphia is a beautiful place.

A Wawa trip and a nap later and we were ready to get onto the festivities that were planned for us by friends and family. Every time Jamie and I head back to our home state of Pennsylvania; we immediately split up to see our different groups of friends and family. It is pretty incredible that I don’t see her until we meet back up at the airport days later at the end of the trip. We live together. I see here every day, but when we get back home to see our parents, we just wave goodbye and do our own thing.

I woke up from my nap on my mom’s couch and immediately had a beer. I am on vacation. It is my bachelor party weekend. I plan on being at least buzzed the entire time. Since I do not really drink anymore, I had to spend the week leading up to my bachelor party doing shots every night to rebuild my tolerance. I chatted with my mom for a while over a 10 am brew and decided to make my way over to my dad’s house. For those of you who have no idea who my father is, let me give you a quick rundown. He believes he is a 21-year-old and he also believes it is the year 1986. He usually is shirtless and wearing ripped jeans or something he found on the side of the road. He will drink you under the table and steal your woman. Motley Crue and Talking Heads are usually what is listening too. He loves to wander the neighborhood with his metal detector and can’t be caught without a beer in his had no matter what time it is. So, you can see why I would want to hang out with him immediately. 

We spent the afternoon looking through his raised vegetable garden, playing frisbee, and taking down two 6-packs. The level of relaxation that we achieved was nothing short of incredible. I put my phone down and forgot about it. When was the last time you did that? I was fully immersed in the relaxation aided by the help of cheap American, canned beers. 

I passed out for a long sleep sometime in the early night. We had to be up early for golf with the entire bachelor crew the next morning. Some of the bachelor party had never golfed a day in their lives. If you think my dad has golf, owns an acceptable pair of golf pants (or any pants for that matter), or knows the etiquette of golf, you’d be dead wrong. He showed up in his best-ripped jeans shorts and a case of Narragansett - safely stowed in a soft cooler of ice. We were ready to hit the links.

It is safe to say we finished all the beer and almost got in a fight on the 11th hole. By the time we reach the 11th, we were all a little drunk and taking our time aiming our shots. The foursome behind us yelled something along the lines of, “Hurry the fuck up, you drunk fucks!” None of us were having it. We were all in good moods and no one was going to stop us. All of us yelled back all the obscenities we could remember and were willing to start a fight in the middle of the course. I mean really, why would you start a fight with a group of drunk, blue collar, Philadelphia working men celebrating a bachelor party? “Fuck you, you mother fucking, fuck! I’ll shove this golf club down your throat if you say another god damn word! It’s my son’s bachelor party!” My father yelled. “Should we wait and beat the shit out of them? I got time.” My father asked all of us. I am not going to lie, there was a bit of a pause from all of us but we opted to keep the good vibes going and moved along, but not before we flipped them all of and threw shit at them for the remainder of the game. They never said another word and put up with our antics for the rest of the game.

Over the weekend, my family and friends all went golfing, drank, talked shit, and had a blast. All of my closest friends live across the country now. It was great to see those who had flown in to celebrate our upcoming wedding. For some of us, we hadn’t been home together in years, and we picked up right where we left off. These relationships are special. It is rare to find people that genuinely care about you and want to celebrate what you are doing. It is even harder to find someone who will care about you for decades to come. It is times like these where you learn who is in it for the long haul with you, and who was there for a few short bus stops.

-YourFriendMatt

Moving...again...

So we are hitting the road again, back to California. In the last four years, we have made three major moves across the country. It is starting to become standard. We are just used to keeping it simple and downsizing. This time around as we are packing it is becoming easier to get rid of unnecessary items, clothes, kitchen supplies, etc. The staff at Buffalo Exchange here in Nashville is probably getting tired of me hauling boxes and boxes of old band t-shirts.

Moving is always bittersweet. We look forward to getting back to Santa Monica, the beach, fish tacos, our friends there and riding our bikes to work, but leaving is always hard. We are fortunate and always find AMAZING people wherever we go, and leaving people is hard. We know we will see them all again, but it does suck. We have had a blast finding new restaurants with our friends here, having BBQ pizza cook-offs with our neighbors (who we love dearly), and sharing so many porch beers. 

Nashville is where I bought my first home and took some significant steps in my adult life. This is where I decided to make Jamie my (future) wife and where we pushed our careers. Nashville continued to push Jamie and me to work together as a team. When we first got here, we did not know a soul and that kind of pressure can make or break a relationship, but we only got stronger. We will miss everyone here. Thank you to anyone who was kind to us, shared their lives with us and treated us like family. We love you.

-YourFriendMatt

A few weeks off...

It has been an interesting few months. I took some time off from updating YourFriendMatt.com to wrap my head around it. When I think about it, the last year has been a whirlwind. We bought our home and moved in. We got settled into a new city and routine. Jamie found work. We started making our house a home by decorating, repainted and refinishing the whole thing. We even added a deck on the back half of the house. 

If that does not sound like a lot, we just got engaged in July and set a date for late 2018. We have been busy, and I could not be more proud or excited for what will happen next.

Stay tuned.

Creepy...

We recently had a break in. It sucked, but since then we have been going borderline overboard with security. Essentially we can now see and hear every square inch of our home, including yards; plus any motion detection. Everything is controllable from HomeKit on our iPhones, cloud-stored audio, and video. The works. So nerdy. The fun part is that we can now spy on each other and creep each other out when we are not home. The other day I was yelling at my dog to get off the couch from work. She looked so confused on the camera as I watched. Jamie even scared me the second day we had thee cameras set up by whispering ghost noises throughout the house.

We are creepy.

-YourFriendMatt

We had a break in...

I was at Kroger picking up some groceries so Jamie and I could enjoy our Friday night together. We had both just gotten out of work and looking forward to spending the night watching scary movies and lying around. I was checking out and felt my phone vibrate. I looked down to see Jamie’s name on my phone screen. I picked up; she sounded different. She was rambling, saying that our neighbor ran over as Jamie soon as she pulled up to tell her someone was in our backyard. I did not believe her, but I was only down the street at the store, so I raced home. I found Jamie standing in the street with our neighbor staring at the house. I confidently explained that all was well and told her I would check out the perimeter before we went in.

I took cautious steps across my lawn as if it was a Scooby-Doo mystery and my confidence was waning. I peered over our tall privacy fence to see that our bedroom window had to be broken open and there could be someone in the house. I ran back to the street, fumbling for my phone to call the police. This moment will be one I never forget. When you are young you feel in control; nothing can happen, and you are the master of the universe. And at this moment, I was not in control. Our dogs, all possessions, and lives are in the house. I juggled trying to remain calm, console Jamie and figure out how to get the cops to the house as quickly as possible. 

Nashville Police responded within 4 minutes. These 4 minutes felt like an eternity. I did not hear any barking, and if you have ever met our dogs, they are exquisite at barking. I got Jamie into her car so she would be out of the way as the officer approached me and the house. He confirmed that there could potentially be someone in our home. He did not hear any barking. He radioed for backup so they could sweep the house. The next two officers arrived in minutes as I tossed them the keys to my front door while I pulled a 9-iron from the back trunk of my Ford Expedition.

As time went on I got more instinctual, my thought process change. More efficient. At least I think so. I believe this is adrenaline. I knew Jamie was safe. Check. I knew the dogs could be in trouble. Check. I knew that there was a problem. Check. My safety was irrelevant. Check. Fix the problem. Check. Besides, if someone was going to try to escape after breaking into my house and robbing me of more than belongings, I was a least going to take a swing or 2. I don’t want to hurt anyone or get hurt. But I was not thinking clearly. I readied my aim as the officers came back out from the house. “Do you see two small dogs?” I yelled from the street, “Yeah, I see two little shits right here!” Exclaimed one of our neighborhood friendly police officers. They found no one was in our home. Whoever it was did manage to scare the hell out of our dogs, mess up our house and steal as much as they could carry.

We are all safe and sound. This could have been way worst, and I am thankful that we are here to talk about it. In the end, a few stolen speakers, trip-money change jar and cash are nothing compared to having the people you love with you unharmed. I hope that whoever took our stuff (and sense of security) made it worth it.

I know that they suck and we are still badass.

On a funny side note…I ordered a security system for the house the day before this happened. The irony, am I right?

-YourFriendMatt

Friday 6-Pack...

Loving this week's list including some new jams from bands like Grayscale (from my home state!) and Microwave! Check it out and enjoy the weekend!

Enjoy! Share! Have fun!

-YourFriendMatt

Homeowners...

“Well, what do we do now?” - us.

We have just taken a huge step in our lives. For whatever reason, the forces guiding us thought it was time to buy a home…so we did. We are officially homeowners, and citizens, of the great city of Nashville, TN. It is an odd, scary, exciting, anxious, endless all-emotion-encompassing time of our lives.

Standing in the living room for the first time in our new home, we couldn’t help but scratch our heads in uncertainty, having no idea what to do next. We stared at each other in the classic “I don’t know, what do you want to do?” trap. We spent weeks searching for a home, signing papers, wiring thousands of dollars for a reason we did not really understand; always kind of thinking in the back of our minds “there is no way this will go through.” Now, standing here it seems that the process of buying a home happened in the blink of an eye, and we were left with the keys in hand.

This has become one of the most rewarding and challenging times of my life. I think back to all the work accomplished throughout the years at the gas station in high school, slaving at McDonald’s, working business sales for commission and finally my current position...saving as much as I could, knowing I would one day buy a piece of Earth, and that day has come. Looking at my bank account is a shock (to say the least), but I know that I am investing in our future, and I could not be happier.

Here's to all the memories we will create here and if anyone ever wants to stop by; you know my fridge always has a beer waiting for you.

Enjoy the day!

-YourFriendMatt

Scenic Route...

 "Where in the hell are we and who owns all these cows?"

This weekend Jamie and I took the scenic route up to San Francisco to visit with some friends. We love road trips and we ecstatic that we had extra time to take the long way up the coast. We cruised up the PCH for hours past countless forgotten beach towns and cattel farms. It's amazing how many cows there are wondering the golden hills of California. Honestly, who the hell do they belong too? 

When we finally ran out of gas, which always seems to happen happens when you are about 80 miles from the nearest gas station, we found King City.  We didn't getting to spend much time there but we were able to find this actual general store and meandered the dusty aisles for souvenirs. This was a true truck stop but we had the sense this was the kind of town that the Disney/Pixar movie Cars was based on. The owner was elated that we were there, showed us around, petted our dog and even threw in a free frisbee with our purchases.

What was your last road trip? 

Ol' Trusty...Part One...

"Dude, this could be her last ride. It's only right we take her." I said to Chris convincing him to take the dilapitated band van to our most recent show.

Throughout the years music has taken me across the nation and back. I consider these some of the most formative years of my life. When you are 1,400 miles from home, have no money, everything you own is broken or smelly you learn a thing or two. Since my friends and I started playing music we have destroyed every one of my mom's cars, most of my friend's parents cars, every one of our own cars, vans bought strictly for the band (old or new) and now we have a hand-me-down 2005 Ford FreeStar.

The band van is a beautiful thing. It's your safe house. Office. Board Room. Mobile home. Sales force..makeshift acoustic performance stage...salvation and worst nightmare. I've learned more about  auto repair on the side of the highway...at night...in a state I've never been too...with 18-wheelers whizzing by...underage...in the snow...than I ever will in a driveway. All in all seeing new things from a bench seat in a busted van was one of my favorite parts of the journey.

Up until this point of my life preforming has been something I have always done. I have had a chance to play with some great musicians in Los Angeles since my move but haven't hit a stage in a few months. When my old band got a call from the biggest rock radio stations in Philadelphia to preform live we all went for it. I landed in Philadelphia the day before the show and we ran through our normal setlist, caught up and went home to get a good night sleep.

We gathered on the day of the show at Chris' house to get a plan together. We needed to figure out how we were going to get our equipment to the show. Take separate cars? No, that is lame. Then it dawned on us (well at least me) that the old band van was still sitting out front.

Side-note: A quick back story on this van: It was Chris' families van for years. It has carted him and his siblings to countless karate and basketball tournaments. As the years progressed the air conditioning eventually gave up resulting in too many summer adventures with both sliding doors open...including a trip all the way to Outer Banks, NC from Swedesboro, NJ with the doors open. I know the van has been in at least one accident on the highway and after that they gave it to Chris...who never fixed the headlight. Why bother? Something is also wrong with the battery connection so we had to carry around a little wrench to undo the positive connection to the battery everywhere we went. We would show up to work, pop the hood and unhook the battery...besides all that...this van is a gem and we wouldn't have it any other way. One more thing, it looks like this on the inside...

"Dude! Let's take the van!" I screech cracking an ice cold Pabst. "I don't know man, I haven't started her in months." Chris says turning to me. "Dude, this could be her last ride. It's only right we take her. Who knows when we will do this again!" Sipping and spitting beer everywhere. Chris shrugs with a half-assed sigh and we make our way outside to check out the van.

She sits on the street waiting for us to come check her out. She hasn’t been moved in months and there is a layer of yellow and brown dust pollen covering her exterior. One of the tires is just about flat but we know we can make it to the gas station to fill it back up. As we peer in the back tinted windows we see our previous filth from the last ride…and its disgusting…just the way we like it. “Let’s pop the hood and connect the battery!” Chris yells getting more energized remembering all the good times we have had in this beauty.

There was a zap of blue electric that shocked us as we reattached the positive connection to the battery. “Yes!” We belted with a second wind of excitement. This was a good sign and we both knew it. Chris ripped open the driver side door ready with his keys and turned the ignition. She turned over with a sputter, pop - and finally roared like a dying old bird…our dying old bird. “Well boys I guess we know how we're are getting to the show! Let’s start packing!”

We packed, drank the last of our beers and decided it was time to head to Philadelphia. Half of our band had to drive separate due to obligations after the show and work the next morning. This was no big deal - Chris and I found it poetic. We had started a lot of bands together and worked on more music than either of us could remember. We had no idea when we would get the chance to drive to preform together again so it made sense to us that the rock gods aligned the stars this way. It was like we were 17 again.

To be continued...

YourFriendMatt

Accidents Happen...

 "FUCK! THAT'S A LOT OF BLOOD!" She yelled. 'Remains calm under pressure' is not something stated on her resume.

Jamie had just cooked us a delicious pasta dinner. She cooks and I clean. It's how it works for us. And I have no problem with it. I eat well. After we engorged ourselves with rigatoni it was time for me to get the dishes done. I went to put the spices Jamie used away in our pantry and as I opened the cabinet door another spice bottle fell out tumbling to the ground. Normal and no big deal. I shut the cabinet door of our pantry (or so I thought) bent over to get the bottle and as I came back up BAM! I clipped the corner of the cabinet door that was now open unbeknownst to me. I hit the door so hard it knocked me back spilling the spices I was holding all over the floor. I put my hand to my head instinctually rubbing my injury. When I took my had off my head it was covered in blood and I could feel the top of head getting warm. I have never seen anything like this before on my life but I cocked my head and blood started pouring out to the floor like someone had turned on a faucet.

"Jamie!" I cry. She was on the couch Pinterest-ing on her iPad. She looked up from the flower arrangements and recipes glowing on her screen and responded with a quick "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?"  like I intentionally cut my head open to piss her off. "Oh, ya know, my normal 8:30 bleed-from-the-head routine, no big deal." I said sarcastically "Get me a towel!" I was now on one knee worried I would pass out from blood lose... if I was going to pass out I didn't want to fall that far. Head injuries are now joke. I can't believe how much blood flowed onto the floor. Jamie grabbed the roll of paper towels ripping a handful off and throwing them to me as fast as she could "OH MY GOD YOU ARE GOING TO DIE! SHOULD I CALL AN AMBULANCE! ARE YOU GOING TO DIE? THATS IT! I AM CALLING MY MOM!" She yelled so quickly it could be mistaken for one long incoherent run-on sentence. "Calm down. Relax." I ordered as I pulled the paper towel from my head "It's nothing, just a flesh wound..." I trailed off as more blood spilled on the floor and I reach for more paper towels.

Quick! Take my picture!

Jamie called her mom and I sat down on the floor. Not because I was light headed (pun intended) but because if anymore blood was going to spill on the floor I'd rather it was on linoleum. "MY MOM SAYS TO APPLY PRESSURE!" I heard from the other room. "What the hell did she think I was doing?" echoed in my head. At this point what else could I do? Yep, might as well grab a beer.

...HighLife or no life...

After a while the blood slowed to a stop and our night came to an end. Jamie and I agreed I should stay up a while just in case I had a concussion. I called my mother before bed for support and to fill her in on what was going on in my life. What better time than right now while my head is spewing blood? I woke up this morning feeling fine besides a minor headache.

Remember when all else fail...beer will solve everything.